The Community of Cidade Vella is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Amancio o Vello with a fair hand, and notable for its state-planned economy, smutty television, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 4.622 billion Cidadáns Vellos are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Rúa da Amargura. The average income tax rate is 99.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Cidadán Vello economy, worth a remarkable 1,008 trillion maravedís a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 218,118 maravedís, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Old fossils give the tours at the parliamentary museum, re-education centers are being added to most prisons, enemy navies sail within bombardment range of major coastal cities with impunity, and it is illegal for police officers to carry out searches due to strict privacy laws. Crime is totally unknown. Cidade Vella's national animal is the worm, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Atheism.

Cidade Vella is ranked 1,007^th in the world and 12^th in The Leftist Assembly for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 5,427.96 on the Clooney Contribution Index.